Sure “trying” is the fun part for a normal couple but in IF world not so much. Unless of course by fun you mean pill after pill, shot after shot, exams, ultrasounds, heart break, pain, pressure, surgeries, procedures, peeing on a stick and seeing a negative reply every time, having timed intercourse for a chance of hitting your body’s exact surge, husbands sample in a cup, transfers, havesting. Sure, trying to get pregnant is the fun part….unless you are infertile! 1 in 8 woman struggle with this invisible disease daily. They beg, make deals, pick out names, buy a cute outfit, design the nursery in their minds only to receive another negative test month after month.
“Just adopt” some say, “stop trying so hard”, “I know so and so and they adopted and then got pregnant”, “kids are a headache, be lucky it’s just the 2 of you”….all of these may be said out of love but each one reminds us of the trials and failures we face constantly. The waiting, the medicine, more waiting, having faith and hope and then 2 weeks later having it ripped away from you. Worse yet, seeing that positive after years of trying and sharing the news with all only to have your body reject the miracle and lose it. Being part of a support group with 1,450 other woman who know what 2ww, bfn, bfp, dh and other things like that stand for. Knowing that we all share something so personal that many of us are scared to even share with our families and friends and yet we are all strangers. We cry together, celebrate together, hurt for each other’s negative reply. Hearing how marriages are falling apart, husbands and wifes no longer want the same thing, the doctor says nothing more can be done… it is all heartbreaking.
So yeah I suppose trying to get pregnant is the fun part unless you are one of the 7.3 million people who have fertility issues. My journey is up to God. My path is already planned. My desire to be a mom and make my husband a daddy is well known. For now though we sit and finish our 2ww….
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