Jethro and Joplin.....

The Joplin tornado took place 1 year ago today - May 22nd 2011. I remember where I was...sitting at a KU baseball game with Rich Greenway and Dawn Crump. What I didn't know was where Jethro was or even that he existed. Fast forward 2.5 months and a picture of a scared little dachshund shows up on the Joplin Humane Society page. It was a Saturday night and I wanted him so bad. My heart broke for the scared little puppy I saw. I learned he had been on the streets, then in the shelter 2 weeks prior to being caught. Every day I emailed until Thursday August 11th when the lady who wrote me back said "I can see how bad you want him. His name is Chase and I will hold him for you until Saturday". Rich thinks she just wanted me to stop emailing to see if he was available...lol. On August 13th - Goliath's 2nd birthday - we went and brought Jethro home. Yes, we changed his name- Chase seemed an awful name for a pup that had gone thru all that. From the beginning he was scared...clung to me in the back seat the whole 2 hours home. He slept for what seemed like 2 weeks straight. If you moved suddenly, he jumped. If you left a room, he followed but then would back out in front of you to keep his eyes on you. If you tried to pet him, he ran. After 9 months, Jethro has just realized that he likes belly rubs. He doesn't jump at every sudden move. He jumps in your chair to keep it warm when you leave the room. He loves to be pet but still not picked up. He smiles, gives the best air kisses and just wants to be loved. Jethro is still afraid of thunder storms, hates fire truck sirens and isn't fond of people walking up on him that he doesn't know. I don't know why nobody ever came to find him. In the beginning I was afraid to get too attached thinking someone would post that they were looking for him. We had several issues with the boys vs pillows and even an arm of Rich's chair (oops). We are pretty sure in addition to the trama of the tornado, he was abused based on how he acts sometimes. We had to go thru the potty training phase and the nibbling phase but it was all over quickly. Jethro knows where to go potty and he knows what treats, outside and good boy all mean. Jethro and Goliath are the best of friends now. Where one goes, the other follows. Jethro makes sure Goliath gets settled in his bed at night before coming to ours. He sleeps down at my feet or the back of my knees and makes his way up when a storm comes. They are never far away from momma. In fact, as I write this, Jethro is by my side and Goliath has made his way to sleeping behind me forcing me to the end of the couch. And you know what?? I wouldn't have it any other way!!

Jethro's picture at the Humane Society... so sad in the beginning

Jethro and Goliath.... happy boys!!

Mother's Day....

moth·er's dayNoun: A day of the year (In the US, the second Sunday in May) on which mother's are particularly honored.

Every day for the past 10 years I've dreaded the second Sunday in May.  Going out in public and people assuming just because you're female, although there are no children near you, that you are a mom and they should wish you a happy day.  I even stopped going out on this Sunday and started finishing everything the day before... that didn't help.  They started wishing early last year.  Now don't get me wrong- I love my mother, my mother-in-law, our sisters, our numerous family members and friends that are all moms and hope they have a wonderful Mother's Day...but for me; it is a painful reminder that another year has come and my arms are still empty.  Mother's Day should be for honoring all the trial's one has overcome to earn that title, the sacrifice and determination a woman has gone thru for her child.  Yet for an infertilite woman who makes all of her plans, dreams and hopes around a child not yet conceived, and who loves them even though they are not here; more than she ever believed - it is the hardest day of the year.  She appreciates and understands the miracle of life and what a blessing a child is, but that doesn't fill her empty arms and hurting heart.  Each day I have to find a way to cope, to suppress the tears, the anger, the hurt...each day I have to put one foot in front of the other and move on.  I owe that not only my family and myself but also to the child(ren) we will one day have. 
So this year when you're wishing a Happy Mother's Day to someone or accepting the wishes from a loved one and friends, I hope you truly understand what it means.  I hope you appreciate the honor you have been given in being a mom.  I say this because there are many of us out here that would give everything for just one day; just one "I love you mom"; just one Happy Mother's Day!